Don’t Judge Me

Only In the absence of judgement 

 Will there be time for reflection and change.

~Modesta Tonan

I think, there are two reasons why people are judgemental.

First, people make judgements because they are afraid of different viewpoints, they fear being outside of a zone at which they feel uncomfortable.

Second, people make judgements in order to mask their own insecurities, this makes them feel superior to others.

It is a reality that everybody is judgemental at one point or another to a certain degree. Everyone has a habit of 


The derivative of the word “judgment” comes from the word prejudice which means “to prejudge something before all the information and facts are in about a situation and at the same time make the person who is judging you think they are in a better mindset.”

Instead of trying to check their facts. When this happens, they become judgemental, and seldom open their minds to the reality of the situation, failing to accept it as it is, and only view it as they want it to be.

I personally know many relationships that suffer and some end because of this judgmental mindset. 

Unfortunately, love is judgment at it finest.

We judge if people are suitable for us and are deserving of our time, effort, and attention.

I know most of you think judgements are made about people, but it’s also inevitable in today’s society. 

We tend to judge anything and anyone that doesn’t fit our “norm” 

We judge – at heart – because we don’t know everything. We judge because we’re trying to fill in gaps in our logic about people and the world around us. 

Well guess what?? 

There’s more we DON’T know, than we DO know, so don’t try to guess. Because when you do, you are making judgements, with some possibly rooted in jealousy, anger, and hurt. You may even deceive yourself to think you are just speaking the truth. 

I do believe growth and mindset is a inward reflection. Until you understand that there is a distinct difference between positive criticism and being judgmental, you will not live in your own truth. 

Positive criticism is the ability to share knowledge and understanding with the hopes of the individual progressing in a positive way with new knowledge. Where as being judgemental is to hurt, condemn and drag people down. It’s filling the air with negative energy. It’s not being kind or real it’s not facing your truth. 

Today I challenge each and everyone one of you, to not pass judgment, but instead try to patiently understand what it is you know nothing about. 

Today just be KIND. 

Love Love

Modesta Tonan